Metal Gear Sex 2: Sexy Substances
by hcsoup
Summary: Snake and Pals travel through time, and find more surprises than they expected... WERE TALKIN' DOWNTOWN


Metal Gear Sex 2: Sexy Substances 

By: Ninjilla and Heavens

Snake jumped out of the plane in a g string

and held Raikov between his legs

and because snake doesn't have a dad

ocelot is

both

Because his penis is bigger

and he has a hat

so ocelot raped himself

and 3 days later

he had snake

who he named naked snake

and Snake named his real son clothed snake

but he was really born n3k1d

with a penis as large as snake

and ocelot

put together

yes, so 3 inches

times 60

clothed snake was kidnapped

by the patriots

and they named his penis willy Mc Bootys Collnz

and he is the dad of Fatman

who says time to start the party

of the snakes

times 70

so Naked Snake crawled through the jungle looking for his son

and he remet Ocelot

who looked sexy

and just sex

ocelot then did his hand gesture

and raped snake senseless

the hand sends swarms of microscopic dildos filled with ocelot sperm

and got him pregnant

snake has a child

named

Dildo Malinky

he has a small wang

so he asks the fury for viagra

and the fury is just mad he had a small wang, so he is hapy now

ocelot sleeps with

everybody

and EVA slaps him

because shes already too big a whore

then raikov jumps in

with a thong

and says

"BABYCAKES!"

and the End jumps in on an extreme wheelchair jump and dies

then his parrot

flies away

and into snake's

butt

and snake likes it

but he puts a WP grenade in there

and Volgin thought it was an invitation

but snake wants more

So he asked Raiden to come through time travel

and Raikov and Raiden clicked and they left snake

and they had babies

3 of them

named

Billy, Bally, and Mick

but BIlly kills himself, and Bally makes lotion, and realizes hes a faliure

then goes on to create

bally's total fitness

and he becomes a success, but Mick kills him and wears his uniform

and this gives Naked an idea

to get to the SHagohod

but volgin comes in

and rapes him

with his hands

snake thinks hes pregnant

and yells KUWABARA KUWABARA KUWABARA GASMSMSMS

and the baby goes away

but snake breaks up with sokolov

just in case

So he blows up the shagohod

and spanks Boss

and in doing so earns a cool dude eye patch

and after getting raped by future raiden and Sigint, paramedic clones Naked and makes 3 sons

Solid, Gassy, and Diarrhea

but the other two got names changes

sokolov thinks he is the father

so he takes gassy away

to england

where he becomes homosexual

and gets an accent

and learns to drink tea

and that causes his wang to shrink

SO he thinks SOlid is to uber for him

so in the year 3000

he remakes Outer Heaven

and Snake is really old by now

and when he sees Ocelot, he crys at his beauty

and his voice

and his hair

but Ocelot kicks him and says "THIS PAYNIS IS THE BEST PAYNIS EVAR"

AND SNAKE SAYS YES

YESSS

and looks at his weenie

and cries

and smells it

and makes more tears

of Joy

then tears of jiz

cause ocelot jizzed in snake's eyes

and he got an uber eyepatch

called "Snake-o-vision baby"

then raikov steps in

naked

and seduces snake

and ocelot

but hes all old

so hes shrunk

but that makes him sexy

and so ocelot has fun with him

while Octopus and Mantis have tentacle smex

and snakes like WTF EVAR BARREL ROLL DAWG

then diarrhea joins in

and he says

I WAZ DA PREZ

and he changed his name to solidus right there, then a commercial came

LAST TIME ON MGS2SS! SOLIDUS GETS A NAME CHANGE!

and Goku didnt know wtf to do

so he was tranq'd by Snake

solidus got aids

from an unknown texan

because he was lame

and not Grey Fox

grey fox fought off aids

and pwns them, but just before getting pwnd by Shago-Gear

SO snake hid under 4 boxes, but only one had him, the others had aids

and Meryl got pissed and pissed on the box till she saw an exclamation mark

gassy comes in

and bitch slaps meryl

and rapes the colonel

for interrupting his bitchy bro

and changes his name to British

then to Liquid

so liquid lets his hair down

in front of snake

and snake gets a boner

and his location is revealed in the hidden 5th box

and his boner trips everyone and kills metal gear

effectively killing the worlds source of awesomeness

then raiden flies in

with no pants

and jizzes in snake's eye

and they become Adam and Eve

and make the worlds population rise

but God (boss) hates them so she jizzes all over like a volcano

and makes real life like dinosaurs

because shes old

FIN?

beep beep bring

Ocelot: Yes... Ive got Snakes jiz... yes I want to be a patriot... thanks for the skeet bar by the way...

FIN


End file.
